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The Banging Of A Drum

The Beat Of My Heart

The Sickly Sweet Thoughts

Sorries Are Such A Foreign Word

I Can’t Breath, And I Can’t Understand

I’m Sorry, But I Feel This From Holding Your Hand

We Just Met, But Now I’m More Confused

I Don’t Want Fun And I Don’t Want Commitment

My Friends Keep Me Alive

That Really Is True

I’m A Self Destructive Loner

And I Love To Suffocate In My Woes

But

I Just Want

I Just Want To Be Me

Last years dreams and tomorrows nightmares

Your scent is choking my word into the back of my throat

I look into the future, but before I do I must sneak into the past

A thousand tears I have cried, one for each memory I have lost

Each one has been faded, I feel almost jaded

Is this who I want to be?

Last years dreams and tomorrows nightmares

Your scent is choking my word into the back of my throat

I look into the future, but before I do I must sneak into the past

Dark eyes and the beauties with holder

Amazing, was all I could say I’ve never felt to stupid in my life

This makes no sense to anyone but me

Last years dreams and tomorrows nightmares

Your scent is choking my word into the back of my throat

I look into the future, but before I do I must sneak into the past

Now I’m ready for it to be over

I wish people could see what I do ……. Because truly each and everyone of you are amazing people, and your talent blows me away, if I could make the world sit up and see what amazing people you are ……. I’d do it in a heartbeat …… just don’t forget me when you get there?

Tears don’t fall, they suffocate in your beauty

Hannah xxxx

This is actually a song I wrote, not a poem but a song *shock faces* hehe it has no tune but thriller and thnks fr th mms inspired mee! Im so inlove with them! Can’t wait to see the new vid when i get to college 2moz! P.s my mum thinks im gay =S nothing against em, but im pretty sure im not =S I just talk the talk hehe, its abit of fun why don’t they get that?

Overused and abuse one lines, they say I’m the queen of disappointment

My dreams have become nightmares of what ifs and memories

I saw them lower in a shallow grave (ooh not as shallow as you)

Let me scream my excuses its never my fault

(never ever the one to believe in you)

Don’t you wish you could hate me?

(you’d just be lying if you did)

(ooh the vibration of your heart has never been so appealing)

I’m sitting in shattered dreams and broken blood

(Am I making you sweat? Your fears have come true)

Believe in me when I say its time for you to say goodbye?

Give me a twisted smile and a broken smirk

Let me scream my excuses its never my fault

(never ever the one to believe in you)

Don’t you wish you could hate me?

(you’d just be lying if you did)

(ooh the vibration of your heart has never been so appealing)

Difference isn’t what separates us (its what shares your bed)

This isn’t a love song, and I’m pretty sure I don’t hate you

Ooh its nearly the end and you’ve already fallen inlove with my false promises

Long live the heartbreaker

Can you keep up the tempo? Can you sway with tears?

Let me scream my excuses its never my fault

(never ever the one to believe in you)

Don’t you wish you could hate me?

(you’d just be lying if you did)

(ooh the vibration of your heart has never been so appealing)

Sunshine! XD

“Every Dot Com, Refreshing For a Journal Update” ~ wentz is a fricking lyrical genuis!

But In All Of That Nix & Sarah && Kelly Have Such A Way With Words It Leaves Me Breathless.

Love to love you, your rock my world and leave my head in a spin!

So thankful for yew reading tis!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

What can I say?

This place has changed to much, I have been thinking a lot after reading a journal I think she knows who she is, and I think people have become to commercial on here!

I have met the greatest people and I will never forget them!

Wanna contact me?

msn:

Myspace:

Beebo:

If you don’t have any of them, I will be on here just once a month to read fics and things like that so message me!?

I love you all a lot, and I will miss you all so much

Goodbye for now

Maybe I’ll see you soon

Hannah, Hannie, Mrs Shoes

XXx

p.s I’m not going permanently I just won’t be on a lot okay?

What the fuck has happened? *insert clueless look*

Why is everyone deleting there account? Or going private? Or even deleting there friends list?

Something NEEDS to be done, a lot of good people are being sent hate mail or just plain hate!? And I don’t want to loose another good friend, you all mean a lot to me, but instead of friendly conversation like I used to get, I’m being informed that they are leaving, going private or shorting their friends list …… its true I don’t talk to you all, but I have at least once and I’m always up for a chat!

I’m actually considering leaving (and those who know me well know how much I love this place) and think what I’m saying is for attention or even a hoax ….. JUST TRY ME

Grr, that has put a real damper on my day ……………

Back to the actual journal part of my journal:

Sorry I’ve been missing for the past two days, been a little hectic over ere! Had my first day of placement on Thursday …..I am the ghetto superstar of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” and while I was at Lakeside, I decided I wanna become Mrs Shoes, coz Mr Shoes must be so lonely XD

Went tek last night, it was surprisingly a good night! Can’t feel my bum muscles thou XD

Toodles!

Hannah!

It’s been a while? I don’t mean the fact that I’ve been gone in the sense of this being an actual journal, instead of ramblings of my so called mind!

I’m feeling a little bit sad at the moment, as if everything I believed in has slapped me in the face and wave goodbye. I’ve sat sitting at this computer, staring blankly at a screen, I want to write but all words have left me! I can’t be bothered with work seriously, its haunting me, but still I ignore it …….. Ha like most things in my life I ignore it until it disappears!(which it never does, but what can I say? I’m as dumb as a stick).

I’m currently watching “crufts” and I have decided I want a Boston terrier called Podge!

I’ve run out of stuff to say So I’m gunna go, sorry for wasting your day I’m bored and I’m angry But what can I do? I never will be over you

Xxx Hannie! & Hannah (yes I have an alter ego) xxX

p.s Nix and Sarah(worlds dumbest geniuses(yes I’m stealing it nix) and there to kind to me to)

erm I love yew …… *nods* Kelly and Chloe too But let us not forget Shay, Lauren, Amy, Lisa oh and Lyndsie I LOVE YEW GUYS MORE THEN CHOCOLATE!!

*holds out arms and glasps hands(feeling a lil childlike)* I love you all but at this moment, I can only remember them!

xxxX

I’m running out of words and things to say

I’m using up this space and hoping it will go away

I’ll throw in a few words

Some cliché’s will do

Or maybe I’ll try the truth!?

As I walk between the stars and the moon

Whistling your favourite tune

No your right, this doesn’t make sense

Has my life become one big mess?

I feel so cheated by you now

When you said forever,

Why

Why did you lie?

I’m sick of repeating myself

I said I’m sick of repeating myself

Wow, Im so embarrssed I think I've hit a new low

I hate this feeling of self worthlessness and insecurity

I hate the fact I always say sorry

I hate the fact I hate love, but I always love to use it

I hate the fact I hate myself so

I hate that my past is full of mistakes

I hate when people say what I do is a cry for attention

I hate the fact I am addicted to drama

I hate hard work and the fact I have no will power

I hate the fact in every second, someone worse off then me is living life will a smile

I hate the fact I am a complete comitmaphope(SP?)

I never wanted to be like this

I hate myself when I tell you things that go on in my mind

I hate that your so good to me, and all I do is add more to your worries

I hate the fact I crave the limelight

I hate that when you read this, you feel sympathy, when I really don’t deserve it

I hate that I will forgive you, but I can never forget no matter how hard I try

I hate that you have no idea what I am, because I will never know

And I hate that I just want to feel accepted no matter what

But do you know what? I hate the fact when I was told you would be here forever, you left me choking on my own blood

There, it is all my hate onto one page, don't you just hate the fact you just read that!?